OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
Randomize
