So, I'm pretty sure I just jacked off and my gf 17 m/o son caught me. IDK how long he was standing in the crib, but he definately saw the grand finale.
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
My life is like a drunken tornado. All over the place and never passing up fat girls
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
I just figured out how I'm going to tie you to my bed. Hint: I may have to go to the auto parts store before you get here.
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
i think im in europe. pls send help
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
The only thing that makes a night with half a bottle of cheap vodka is the other half of that bottle of cheap vodka.
Apparently the girl he banged in the bathroom yelled at him for hitting on me all night. But whatever, he was holding her hand for most of it
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
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