i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
It's either my own vomit or popcorn butter in my ear right now. Banking on the second one.
We made popcorn last night. So it's both
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
Just woke up from a dream where I had lesbian sex with myself (a clone of me)... Take that, Freud!
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
Goal: finish my bio assignment before the Xanax kicks in.
Randomize
