cant believe you said you would bone perez hilton
i said paris hilton
thats even worse
He just made his dick say "woof" and howl at me. can you pick me up?
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
You tell anyone I'm rocking out to Pitbull in an economy, base-model car, I'll kill you.
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
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