Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call.
thanks for leaving the note with the doctor's recommendations for my lip, they are dissolvable stitches right?
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
They were scared I was going to get lost last night so they dressed me up as Waldo so someone would always find me.
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
NO TEQUILA
Why do I always think it's a good idea? Like a challenge? Shit maybe I should CHALLEGE myself to get laid for once instead
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
I wish I could be happy with a nice Christian girl, but no, I need a hot mess who starts bar fights
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
Randomize
