i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
You are writing your college essay comparing yourself to Lady Gaga, Vladimir Putin, and Dale Earnhardt Jr. and you are worried about the conclusion sounding cheesy?
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
I feel like I got run over by a steamroller made of cigarettes and booze driven by all of the men I've slept with.
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
Randomize
