Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
Just took a closer look at the paper that kid wrote me his number on. It was an ATM receipt. His balance is $17.89. i made the right choice.
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
So I have the hangover from hell, spent all night puking, and there's a septic tank truck parked outside the house literally pumping shit. You win God.
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
she has an amazing ass but I need more beers to get past her horse face. It works out perfect becauseI can use her teeth as a bottle opener.
It's official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world.
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
Like he's moved to LinkedIn creeping on me since he's blocked everywhere else & I'm just so confused does he think I'm going to post daily updates of my life on FUCKING LINKEDIN
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
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