This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
Just crushed a xanax into my chewing gum. Its gonna be a long, fucking up flight...
For future reference, a lint roller appears to be the easiest way to get glitter out of a beard.
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
I had to switch coats with someone at work because you can see the giant sex choke bruise on my neck. Being kinky is hard.
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
Randomize
