i just realized i've been trying to levitate the potatoe chip out of her hand for the past ten minutes. i think i smoked to much.
when i was 16 reading the aftercare instructions at the piercing place i wondered why they would ever think to warn me about getting semen in my bellybutton
then i met college
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
an off duty cop drove behind me last night to make sure i didnt get a dui. i was blacked out drunk and on a pill of ecstacy. he knew this. i must be really pretty.
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
Why we can't turn this into a healthy friendship where I cheat on my boyfriend with you and you feel better knowing everything wrong with my life is beyond me.
I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
I woke up this morning with a pop tart under my pillow with one bite eaten. Another pop tart was in the floor. No recollection whatsoever. I ate the one under my pillow for breakfast, though.
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
She wouldn't fuck me because I had a cast, so I took her friend home
Randomize
