I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
Can you put "designated driver" on a resume?
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
Dude she flew me 1000 miles down to see her, broke up with me 7 hrs after arrival, and kicked me out with a week left til I fly home. Thank god college taught me how to shack up
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
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