I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
Stop. You don't mean that. Tequila might mean that. But you don't mean that.
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
Is it penis luge time yet?
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
Managed to get through family dinner without anyone knowing I was tripping balls. Christmas miracle. He exists.
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
His cat watched us the ENTIRE time. Every time I glanced over the poor kitty looked at me as if I were pelvic thrusting her father to death.
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
Randomize
