he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
just cockblocked my boss's 17 year old son at the Christmas party
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
She thinks I come over for the sex, but I really come for the snacks.
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
You rolled onto your side and told me 'this is the recovery position'. That was after you were stoned. You've done this way too much.
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
we panicked because we couldn't find you anywhere, but then we found you tripping in the bathtub with Marie's cat. there was no water. you thought there was water, though.
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
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