fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
I saw a seagull swallow a hot-dog whole today, it reminded me of you.
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
I don't make the first move. Ever. Unless were playing monopoly cause that's my shit
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
The kid across the hall found me in the hallway using a hot pocket box as a pillow. I said its okay I live here.
I need to stop going to bars and yelling "I could be teaching your kids one day, bitches!"
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
You fell out of his top bunk onto his set of golf clubs. After seeing blood on your leg, you proceeded to sing "the first cut is the deepest" while sprawled on the golf clubs
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
whole 5th of capt = waking up in the shower after 2 hours and the whole house asking why i'm STILL in a towel. and me having nothing to say
Randomize
