I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
Ramen noodles and uncensored jerry springer episodes, what a nice life i have.
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
The best way to start drinking is as early as possible. eg, this bar isn't open but we're patiently waiting outside. That way you're confident and exciting when the talent arrives. Or too drunk to care.
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
he literally referred to his penis as the alaskan bull worm from spongebob. when can we get married
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
i just woke up in my dog's bed, on my parents floor, my outfit on backwards, and a bottle of lube poured down my pocket.
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