Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
Im hitting on this chick at a stoplight when all the sudden. i notice this chick blowing some dude in the backseat.
I walked into a room this morning and someone asked how my back was because I apparently threw myself off the porch after attempting to set myself on fire. Who the fuck let drunk me play with fire?!
Better question: who the fuck planted a tree next to the porch?!
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
She wants to have a threesome with Taylor Swift. I think this is the kind of love my grandparents spoke of.
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
Randomize