I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
Gave out candy dressed as a porn star...bet you can guess how the mothers kept reacting.
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
Afterwards the first thing I said was, "You know, you're probably the first guy who has ever gotten laid wearing Star Wars pajama bottoms."
Randomize