This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
Reason #84 I'm on my way to becoming a crazy cat lady: I called the police last night because I heard a noise and the cats were acting funny like they were trying to tell me something. The 3rd time the dispatcher repeated "the cats are acting funny?" I yelled and told her to have an officer ask the cats what happened.
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
It's almost like a boob-text, but it's not. Because it was live. And you were showing a bunch of people.
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
I just wish I had a snapshot of his attempted front flip off the bar. There are some things that are worth getting a life ban for, and the moment of impact with his foot and that lady's face was one of those things.
A guy just grabbed my balls before he shook my hand because he thought he knew me.
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
Got kicked out of the club and woke up at a frat house. Good night? Couldn't tell you. I got a date out of it I'm glad someone thinks my drinking problem is cute.
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
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