isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
Don't forget the part about the bar bathroom stumbles.
Oh damn, you're right. I have to include that. You turned off all the lights with your head. That was impressive.
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
Nah, we’re just sitting around talking about different kinds of boners
Randomize
