I love you and miss you, which in no way dimishes how much I hate the person you turned out to be, but I still love and miss you.
Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
The only thing i was looking forward to on 4th of july was the google logo and they let me down. That and beer, lots and lots of beer
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
I made $130 by ordering two pizzas and charging them $10 a slice. If they weren't so stoned they might have realized they could have just ordered another pizza for $20.
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
I’m not sure she knows my name. She introduced me as “the fuck toy”
Randomize
