your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
it's like iHOP with fire
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
Just drug him and when he wakes up be like "you just woke up from a coma, we've been married for the past five years." It'll be like the Vow but fucked up.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
Momentum is force x velocity. So therefore velocity is 0 - hammered, and force is ur legs locked up and ur face hits the ground.
I felt paralized they just wouldnt move. We need segways when were drunk cuz if we start to fall forward they well take off and save the fall.
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
Right. Cuz nothing screams "You made it!" quite like selling your used underwear to strangers you met on the internet.
Randomize
