i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
I need a $60 an hour job, because I have a $50 an hour drinking habit.
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
The jerky fairy visited my fridge. It's glorious.
I'm not a horrible person, I just see what everyone chooses to politely ignore.. And occasionally say it aloud whilst deeply intoxicated.
Jesus horatio Christ I forgot my mittens and am considering shoving my hands down the pants of the first semi attractive man I see
Dear awkwardly drunk roommate, thanks for stuffing enough change in my clevage that I could afford a pepsi at work today. Sincerely awesome roommate that put up with your drunk ass
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
New life goal: fuck in the shopping cart
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
I feel like my foot is being amputated. Or maybe it's the vodka. I couldn't tell you.
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
Randomize