Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
He fucking owes me dinner after I gave him head under the deck behind the bar.
is it sad that pink shorts and cowboy hats remind me of getting jizz in the hair?
i just woke up and "where the fuck is taco bell" was in my search engine...
I'm so turned on right now it's fucking stupid. I hate burger king commercials
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
She was either really drunk or really not interested. Everytime I tried to ask her about herself she would respond with a line from Stepbrothers.
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
Randomize
