yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
Dear, was it your thong we found wrapped around my hairbrush next to Rachel's bed? Please explain.
I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
I snapchatted him nudes and he didn't screenshot a single one of them because he's a gentleman.
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
A reminder in my phone just went off saying, "Fuck.On.Roof- the Great Bambino". This makes me excited and slightly nervous.
Randomize
