Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
and while your girlfriend wears your relationship pants, i'll be wearing my ecstasy pants
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
I'm home alone drinking wine, so high, scrubbing my house down... This is what my thirsty thursday has become
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
Never let a one night stand shower at your place. My razor, lotion, and brush disappeared. #girlcode
You're finding a boat, I'm going to sleep with a guy that lives above a bar and has 24 hour access. We are really nailing this adulting thing
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
Someone signed my nipple.
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
The strippers who live across the street set up a decently professional stage on their front balcony and a banner for a go fund me... I think we're gonna get a show.
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