Tell LD happy birthday and party like it's $19.99
Recession joke.
just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
my mario cart skills improve with alchohol. and i think my real car skills do to but the cop didnt see my logic
Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
Stop it with the monkey emojis. It's like sexting with Curious George
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
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