I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
She was so loose she sounded like a jar of salsa. I didn't know that was even possible.
wait do you know what youre gonna say if they ask how youre getting back?
yes. helicopter.
i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
We're making herpes jokes very loudly and hoping she notices.
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
Fuck Sunday funday. Fuck real pants. Fuck the sun. Fuck Jameson. Fuck my life. Yes, I am hungover as shit sitting in my office eating bacon.
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
Randomize
