Walk of Shame. In a state park.
This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
how do you say happy birthday to the guy that almost got you pregnant? i cant just write the same thing as last year.
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
The holidays are too long. I always run out of adderall before I run out of family. you got any left?
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
Randomize
