Christians are straight up FREAKS
Blackberries need to come with a feature that disables texting to certain numbers after 2am based on content. liek disabling texting to 'dad' containng the words 'lets try to find more blow.'
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
Just snuck alcohol into the hospital for my mom.
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
Me and the cabbie are stopping on the way at a sit down restaurant to eat. My life is so sad.
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
so, i guess i gotta chill on showing up to work hungover... someone anonymously left a bible in my work mailbox (no one else got one)
I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
Randomize
