I swear to god I'm with a high end prostitute right now and shes the most interesting person I've ever met. She just took me in to share an evening.
And as an added bonus she seems to have gotten a blood stain out of my favorite t-shirt
he's my edward cullen
I am pretty sure Edward Cullen never had an all-day drinking binge topped off with some blow.
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
i pretty much saved your life. you were so conviced that your nail polish remover bottle was "Vodka Lemon"
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
I'm like a walking PSA for tequila shots
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
I'm going to give blood tomorrow. Prepare yourself for pictures and a cynical poem about the heart and its level of tangibility.
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
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