bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
I'm trying this new thing, it's called standards
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
Trying to take a nap and my brain decides to play "lets have flashbacks every time you blew it with a chick in college". It's a montage of stupidity and youthful inexperience. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
It's like the bat signal. He only texts me when I'm naked.
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
He gets married Father's Day weekend and I just found out I'm pregnant. What do I do?
The last I heard from her she said she was going to plant sunflowers, get drunk on white wine and listen to Everybody Wants to Rule the World on repeat.
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
Randomize