you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
what happened last night?
u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style
that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
You should be glad you didn't come with last night. I watched pirate porn for the first time in my life as the 9th wheel.
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
A reminder in my phone just went off saying, "Fuck.On.Roof- the Great Bambino". This makes me excited and slightly nervous.
And I mentioned the burning debate about your circumcision in my Christmas card to your mom.
Randomize
