I drank it, and now my boss keeps hitting me in the face with beams of light.
Tripping at your desk probably isn't the best plan you've had.
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
They took my balls.
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
You're an idiot. I have LIVED as a cautionary tale of what happens when you drink too much and stick your dick in crazy, HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING?
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
Accepting his friend request would be the Facebook equivalent of pity sex.
Randomize