I'm gonna get wrecked tn I might have to keep my phone at home cause I'm sure ill send you really weird txts
Herpes is a lot like Arnold Schwartzenneger. Because it always comes back. Also, because it is usually in some way in control of California.
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
I woke up with like grass burns all over my body, i'm pretty sure i made out with someone under a bus. . . but i'm not sure
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
My cab driver just suggested I brush my teeth because he can smell "the party" on me.
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
Just as an add on, don't expect me to wear matching bra and underwear. If I do, I'm probably drunk and it's your fucking birthday. Have a great night.
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
Randomize
