I look better un-naked...
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
I somehow fell asleep on my kitchen counter using the microwave as a pillow
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
I'm going to crush up my last 7 Percocets into a fine powder and toss my popcorn in it.
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
You're going to replace me with a robot made of heating blankets and a vibrator?
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
Randomize