wat bout pragnant strippers??
I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
And then he said "my dick isn't hard enough and your tits aren't big enough for this to work"
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
Just invented taco cereal.
Lost my key. Fell asleep on the doorstep and got woken up by host grandma poking me with a broom.
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
How do you get kicked out of 3 different Subways in one night..
Not very gracefully, that's how.
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
OH MY GOD MY UBER DRIVER IS PEEING BEHIND A DUMPSTER
Still got in the car though
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