i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
My life is like a Sweet Valley High book but with lots of alcohol.
He's like the fucking Houdini of bras. Not only did I not feel him take it off I didn't find it until two days later.
I bought a police grade breathalyzer on ebay at 4:37 am. At least I'm a responsible drunk.
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
Being able to fart in my own house is like 90% of why I pay rent
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
I knew how high you were when you put a french fry in your mouth and said 'fuck, this tastes like meat but feels blue.'
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
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