Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.
I’m literally naked drinking a beer and I gotta leave in 6 minutes for work lol
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