I thnk I just saw a monkey walking a drunk guy.
She was drunk and kept trying to talk while I was in her mouth. It sounded like the teacher from a Charlie Brown cartoon!
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
and while your girlfriend wears your relationship pants, i'll be wearing my ecstasy pants
He waited til after we had sex to tell me he had herpes... Ugh I hate being drunk
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
I'm going out w/ her for her b-day in a bit. I just talked to one of her drunk friends on the phone who asked if I could "handle 7 lesbian." This could be interesting.
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
Today some guy at work told me I had the nicest hair he's ever seen and my response was "thanks I grew it myself". This is why I'm single.
THIS IS WHAT CELL PHONES ARE FOR! So you can tell me that you're bringing your coworker who lives in the "Halleleuia community" home for a beer SO I'M NOT DRESSED IN LEATHER LINGERIE WHEN HE WALKS IN THE FUCKING DOOR!!
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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