honey bunches of taint.
Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
I feel like a blind man at a water park. Every step has the potential to be either fatal or lead to accidental, but totally enjoyable, sex.
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.
Let's get drunk and put things on the grill that have no right to be there.
Happy birthday, America.
Ps we ordered a pizza at the pool today and I dropped the entire thing in the pool. We still ate it. #canthang
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
He made a deal with his real estate agent called fucking in 50 properties for sale
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
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