doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
I had new employee orientation at the YMCA today. I showed up with a hangover, a black eye, scratches down my arm, and a sore throat from puking gin and keystone.
Can you please tell me why there's a bottle of urine on my night stand with a note that says "in case you're thirsty in the morning"? Thanks.
why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
a queef is a wish your heart makes.
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
So apparently I ran down the hall to another party and started handing out uncooked spaghetti to strangers. You'd be surprised how many drunk people will eat raw noodles.
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
I'm high, watching "Scream" and eating a grilled cheese sandwich off my boobs. I'm not going anywhere
Come on, clusterfuck. Put on a pushup bra and get your fine ass to the bar, or you will be a sad single stoner forever
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
My boobs look fucktastic, I have a booty call on Sunday and a dick photo on my phone. Life is grand!
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