Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
So what's the protocol on sending your exes new wife a baby shower gift that says "thanks for getting him the hell out of my life, please keep him there!"?
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
Randomize
