Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
just stared at ed norton's ass for 26 miles. if there was ever an incentive to run a marathon, that was it. my life is perfect.
he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
This will never work out with him unless I somehow learn how to unhinge my jaw like a python.
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
Just found an unopened tied g of coke on the floor in her room... she thinks the maintenance guy dropped it earlier today. This takes the cake for sketchiest apartment.
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
You know you're fucked up when you decide to pour fireball whiskey in your vegetable beef soup
So we just accidentally broke into a building from the third floor while carrying shovels. The security guards are still very confused
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
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