Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
Need help. Super baked. Stuck on couch. Dying of thirst. Bring paint thinner or something to pry me off. Only thumbs and neck work.
please bring me a paper towel asap.
I was drinking wine in bed and spilt some on my chest.. And I cautiously guided it into my belly button but now I dont know what to do.
You're just jealous because you lost me and I ended up at another party licking Marshmallow Fluff bikinis off of lesbians.
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
You might be at the point of severe desperation when you gotta hold the two pieces of your broken vibrator together just to get off.
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
I took an uber home at 6am. Went to Santanas, apparently they don't take american express. So the uber driver bought my burrito. Success!
I just matched with a taco on tinder. Dreams come true.
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
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