i have the juiciest gold medal in my pants
tequila makes my crab dance SOOOO much better
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
Fuck you. I've got onesies to keep me warm at night. And this bottle.
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
Randomize
