He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
seriously, i am too high for the omelet station to be playing Being For The Benefit Of Mr Kite at 7am
they call him Oral-B. enough said
Don't judge them too harshly for getting kicked out of a strip club. Happens to the best of us.
You are the coolest girlfriend ever.
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
at one point, i told him to buy you a pumpkin spice latte and uggs because you're a common white girl and that's how he should get you in bed
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
Never joke about your clitoris.
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
THERE IS JIZZ ON MY CEILING. HOW THE FUCK IS THERE JIZZ ON MY CEILING
Sorry I fucked your cousin. Again. I just wanted him to take me on his boat.
Randomize
