Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
I'm going to crush up my last 7 Percocets into a fine powder and toss my popcorn in it.
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
How do I send someone an apology text for giving them a lap dance in the middle of a party last night?
I just threw up a strange neon green substance. Did I eat a glow stick last night?
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
On another note, I kinda only wanna poop laying down now
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