Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
Apparently Chef Boyardee is the only guy I'm taking home tonight.
I didn't cheat on him. Cheating means finding out. I made sure he was at work first. After the guy left I got shitfaced just so nothing seemed out of the ordinary when he came home.
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
Can I come kidnap you from work so we can chug mimosas? My little brother has a ski mask I can borrow.
Randomize