Told my mom a bit ago she'd meet you tonight
Um...??
She's excited
Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
I might volunteer to give breath samples on the 17th where I would be required to get drunk and then give samples! THE POLICE WOULD PAY ME AND PROVIDE THE ALCOHOL!
returning from a 6am booty call in 2 feet of snow on a Tuesday is a bold new kind of low for me
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
I hate college football. It's really fucking with our phone sex schedule.
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