I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
My mom ate salad out of the vodka bowl
I'm currently braless eating the balls of the penis cake and drinking warm champagne. I'm 3 cats away from crazy at this point
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
Had a dream we were competing for tomatos.
So I tried to catch a rabbit in Terraria & accidentally blew it up with a grenade made of bees. Monty Python would be proud.
Randomize