I just got fire extinguished by his roommate while we were having sex. That's just taking cock blocking to a whole new level.
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
Being at this bar with grandma is a real cockblocker
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
Yeah. Let's save our goodbyes for when I'm obnoxiously and embarrassingly drunk and more than likely naked.
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
That awkward moment when your boyfriend tries to have sex with his go pro on #hdporn
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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