What tipped you off? The sombrero?
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
Funny how often beer equates to second degree burns on some portion of my body.
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
You should've come out last night, I need someone to explain why the bartender tried to strangle me...
Why the hell did you invite him? He's gonna bring two more inches of dick and zero fun.
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
i think im in europe. pls send help
Sorry this is taking so long. I'm looking for my dignity.
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
he's drunk and referred to his shoes as foot condoms
Randomize