Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
so my aunt is sitting on the couch, eating a brownie and watching the biggest loser saying how it's not that hard to eat healthy
man i love america
someone lit off fireworks while I puked in the street. I was like congratulating me for making it through homecoming.
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
We just set the fire alarm off with a fog machine. What's my first instinct? Finish my drink. I think I handled that correctly.
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
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